resolutions – Measure of Calm

In my last post I talked about my one word theme for the year: Create. It’s one of the two resolution alternatives I am trying out this year. The other comes from a favorite podcast of mine, “Happier with Gretchen Rubin.” For the last three years Gretchen and her co-host (and sister) Elizabeth Craft have been compiling a certain kind of “to do” list for the coming year – “18 for 2018”, “19 for 2019”, and now “20 for 2020.” A 20 for 2020 list is a list of twenty things that you want to do before the end of 2020.

The idea behind the list is not to fill it entirely with unpleasant chores for the coming year. Your list can include fun activities that you’ve been wanting to do, pampering activities that you somehow keep putting off, or places you’ve been meaning to visit. If you want to add more fun or whimsy to your life, you could choose 20 things that are just pure fun. If you’ve lived in a place for years but feel like you don’t really know the place, you could choose 20 local attractions to experience during the year. My 20 for 2020, which I’ll share below, contains a nice mix of things that are fun and things I must get done before the end of this year. I’ve even checked some of them off already. What a change to have some things on my “to do” list that I can’t wait to do!

It’s important to note that the goal here is not perfection. There are some items on the list that absolutely must get done (doctor appointments), some that I want to get done most of the time (movement and meditation), and some where most of the fun is in the pursuit if not the actual attainment (charcoal gray trousers). If you want to create your own 20 for 2020 list and need some inspiration, you might enjoy listening to episode 203 (“Plan Your 19 for 2019”) or episode 255 (“We Reveal Our 20 for 2020 Lists”) of the “Happier with Gretchen Rubin” podcast.

Michelle’s 20 for 2020

Start blogging
Start going to yoga classes
Get a pedicure
Get a massage
Schedule a colonoscopy
Schedule appointment with onco-cardiologist
Create a mobile desk setup that feels good
Find the perfect smoothie recipe that uses broccoli sprouts
Transition to glass storage containers for food
Send at least 4 snail mail cards or letters per month
Daily movement – at least 30 minutes
Daily meditation – at least 3 minutes
College reunion road trip with my friend Lori
Buy the perfect pair of charcoal gray trousers
Get to a weight where my clothes feel and look good
Help my son learn to cook, create a budget, and drive on the highway
Find a skin care regime that works for me
Have fun with my bullet journal
Go on a trip with my husband
Get a laptop computer

The photo at the top of this post is my first attempt at #7 – “create a mobile desk setup that feels good.” Because I like to do a lot of snail mailing and journaling, I tend to accumulate a certain amount of supplies (colored pencils, pens, cards, stationery, washi tape) that I like to have on hand but which can look pretty sloppy without some structure. Deciding that “done is better than perfect”, I chose not to go down the rabbit hole of researching desk organizers on the internet and instead gathered containers I already had on hand – a rectangular basket and some small canning jars. I’m really pleased with how nicely everything is corralled in the basket, and it’s very possible I’ll stick with this setup for a while. I also like the fact that everything fits perfectly, which discourages me from acquiring more “stuff” than I have space for.

I could write a paragraph or more on why I chose every item on my list, but it wasn’t until I was typing the list up for this blog post that I realized just how many of the things I chose to add to the list relate to my one word theme of the year. As the British would say, “Result!”

I can’t remember ever making actual New Year’s resolutions. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve made plenty of resolutions in my life (“My diet starts Monday!”), just never on the occasion of the new year. Resolutions in general tend to have a very short life – think of the crowded gym that gets progressively less crowded over the course of January. Resolutions in my particular life have been a mixed bag. I’m currently on a daily flossing streak that is unbroken since my last dentist appointment in October. I can’t wait until I sit in the hygienist’s chair and when she asks me if I floss I’ll respond, “Does it look like I floss?” I’m viewing it as a science experiment with the hypothesis, “Does daily flossing really make a difference?” But I digress.

As successful as my current flossing resolution has been, I’ve had many failed resolutions, mostly involving things that I will do “every day, no matter what!” Those types of resolutions fail, of course, because all you have to do is miss one day and then the temptation is to say, “Well, there goes that resolution (like all the others I’ve ever made). I may as well have this entire sleeve of Thin Mints.” Then you wave goodbye to the wagon as it rolls off into the sunset.

When 2020 appeared on the horizon I had no interest in making any resolutions, but a couple resolution alternatives presented themselves that I decided to try. The first is creating a one word theme for the year that encapsulates the direction in which I want my life to move during the year. This concept of choosing a yearly one word theme has been around for several years, but seems to be gaining more traction lately. The idea is that this theme will be like a mantra that will remind me of how I want to live, and create a mindset in which action toward that goal is more likely.

It didn’t take me long to come up with my theme for 2020. My word this year is “Create.”

“Create” has two different meanings for me. The first is the most obvious – I want to engage in some creative pursuits that I have been intending to start for a while. This blog! I’ve been wanting to start a blog for many years, probably since I first knew what a blog was. I would read all the most popular “mommy blogs” circa 2005 onward, during which time I was also a mommy of a young child. I loved the idea of sharing my writing within the mommy blogging community, but there was one sticking point – nearly all of those bloggers were also knitting sweaters for the whole family, growing their own organic produce, and living in either Portland, Maine or Portland, Oregon. I didn’t think I would quite fit in with that crafty crowd, but I did admire them. After that the idea of writing a blog sort of simmered on the back burner, mostly but not entirely forgotten.

In 2016 I started a Facebook group called “Nourish and Flourish.” There were about 40 members, all friends or friends-of-friends, and we all had a common interest in living a healthy, mindful life. Many of us were cancer survivors with a new perspective on how we wanted to live our lives. Others were just interested in bringing some healthy balance to their stressful lives. We shared recipes, meditation apps, podcasts, scientific articles – anything that we felt promoted the idea of nourishing our minds, bodies, or spirits. I began writing little mini-essays on my experience as a breast cancer survivor, my battle with anxiety, my thoughts on life in general. At this point the blogging idea came back to the forefront of my mind, and there it stayed.

In addition to the traditional meaning of “Create” I also want to work this year on creating a life that works best for me. A life that reflects my priorities – keeping in touch with family and friends, reading and learning, nourishing myself, being strong – in tangible ways, such as writing four snail mail letters or cards a month, calling my mother every day, keeping track of the books I read in my bullet journal, keeping track of my healthy habits, etc.

Do you have a one word theme for 2020? Even if you don’t want to formally choose a word, what word appeals to you as a theme for the year? I would love to hear what words others come up with.

Tag: resolutions

20 for 2020

Create!