Hello friends,

I was so looking forward to this morning. Yesterday was overcast and intermittently rainy all day and today’s forecast was clear and sunny. I wanted to get out there and photograph some birds! I woke up at 6, grabbed a protein bar from the fridge, stopped off at Starbucks for an iced coffee, and headed to the marsh. While it was indeed clear most of the way to the marsh, conditions turned foggy as I descended further into the valley. The fog was lovely, but just as you can’t see clearly through it, you also can’t photograph with any kind of sharpness. I was disappointed, but I decided not to lean into that feeling. I accepted the situation for what it was (and hoped that the sun would soon burn off the fog).

The little guy (gal?) in the photo above is a muskrat. The marsh has muskrats, otters, and beavers, although I’ve never seen an otter there. The beavers were active this morning, too, but they were always a little too far away to get any kind of decent photograph. The clarity of the water this morning was such that I actually saw the fish, and I was stunned at how many there were and how big some of them were. No wonder the great blue herons love to go there for a meal. I saw several snapping turtles, one of which was so huge that its head was easily the size of a man’s fist.

I had conversations with some of the other birders there. I found out about a couple of places I had never thought to go before, very close by, one of which is known for its owl population. I was nourished by the interactions.

The sun finally did burn off the fog, at about 9, but I had places to go (home, lol) and people to talk to (Beth, Sam, Mom). I realized that allowing the morning to be exactly how it was rescued me from disappointment. There’s definitely a lesson to be learned there.

Have a wonderful week.

Love,

Michelle xoxo

Hello friends,

Last week was a rough one for me. Driving 10 hours home then diving right into office life the next day, and not just any office life, but one of our busiest times of the year. And then the powers-that-be decided what the heck, what’s really important is team-building, so let’s all go bowling. Was it fun? Well, sort of – but work fun is to real fun what the palest of pink hues is to fuchsia.

Suffice it to say that I needed this weekend. Yesterday was spent changing my address on my driver’s license and making sure my address is changed for voting. After that – laundry, meal planning, grocery shopping. All the things that don’t seem like self-care, but really, really are. The best type of self-care: taking care of your future self.

This morning I woke at 6 and went to the marsh. It was cool and clear, and I got there early enough to see a beaver making its last rounds before bedtime. The water lilies are changing – the leaves are getting brown and curling up. I know it’s still July but I got that delicious back-to-school feeling, or at least a prelude to that feeling. There was a hawk making a racket and circling in the far-off sky, but it never came close enough to photograph. I was thrilled that a couple of belted kingfishers and a green heron decided to rest and feed for a while. I stayed at the marsh for two hours and the experience did what it always does for me — it made me realize again just how unimportant all of our human concerns are. Which is good, because I seem to need that reminder at least once a week.

Have a wonderful week.

Michelle xoxo

Hello my friends,

Yesterday, in preparation for my 10-hour drive back to Ohio today, I downloaded several albums from Apple music and an audiobook. The audiobook was “Wild and Precious: A Celebration of Mary Oliver.” It was four hours long and was really well done, I thought. It not only featured readings of about 30 of Oliver’s poems (by the poet and others), but also memories of Oliver from former students and friends, as well as a reflection on her works.

On the music side of things, it was a celebration of all things Jonathan Larson – “Rent” and “tick, tick…BOOM” and an album called “Jonathan Sings Larson”, which was issued by the Library of Congress and is a compilation of audio recordings of variable quality – some live performances as well as his own demo recordings of songs he wrote. I am such a huge fan of Jonathan Larson. I always listen to his music with a tinge of sadness, wondering what he would have produced had his life not been cut short. He died of an undiagnosed aortic dissection – in fact twice misdiagnosed – in the early morning hours of the day before Rent had its first Off-Broadway preview. Rent went on to open on Broadway and won the Pulitzer Prize for Drama and the Tony Award for Best Musical.

Mary Oliver’s most famous poem is “The Summer Day”, with the line most quoted being, “Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” In fact, many of her poems have an urgency about them regarding our brief existence on this earth, and the need to get on with our lives posthaste. In “Fourth Sign of the Zodiac” she writes, “I know you never intended to be in this world. But you’re in it all the same. So why not get started immediately” and in “When Death Comes” she writes, “When it’s over I want to say all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.”

Mary Oliver died at age 83; Jonathan Larson died at age 35. They both lived such full lives, touching so many other lives with their art. I miss them both even though of course I never met either of them. I consider today a day well lived having spent it with these two souls.

I hope you have a wonderful week.

Love,

Michelle xoxo

P.S. I dearly love that little pup Pokey.

Hello Friends,

In the last few days I have driven 650 miles, read a book, spent time with Sam, had a fun morning with my BFF Beth, taken several naps, and enjoyed many Pokey cuddles. The book I read, The Night In Question by Susan Fletcher, was a surprise. I knew that it was a murder mystery and that the protagonist was an elderly woman. I was surprised by the fact that it is much, much more than that. Tender, life-affirming, sad, joyful – it is a celebration of family, friendship, romantic love, and letting yourself be truly seen by the people who love you.

It’s 9:30 on Sunday night as I write this, and I am realizing that the last few days have been so full that I haven’t spent any time thinking about what I might write here this week, and now I’m getting very sleepy. Oops.

I will do better next week. I hope!

Love,

Michelle xoxo

(Started on July 4, 2024, finished this morning):

Hello friends,

Today is Independence Day in the US – celebrating our break from British rule  248 years ago. Yesterday I was telling my friends that I was planning a long hike today to celebrate the independence being healthy gives me. Never to be taken for granted. Or rather, often taken for granted until I’m reminded of how good I have it right now. I can walk unaided. I’m sure that will not always be the case. I can drive myself to wherever I want to go. Ditto. Right now I’m participating in a step challenge with four college friends. This group was created from a larger group of friends, a few of which declined joining the challenge due to issues with their feet or backs. As I sit here on a bench on a boardwalk in the middle of a marsh, I see younger people run by at speeds that are beyond my capabilities and inclination (I am very aware of knees that complain occasionally) – I know that age and accumulated use has diminished my body, but I am determined to not only keep hold of what I do have at this moment, but strengthen and shore up what I can. I don’t know what is down the pike and around the corner for me, but I will face it from a place of strength.

My mind has also been riffing on the theme of independence as it pertains to how I travel through life. No man is an island – I had to Google who said that (John Donne). I talked the other week about weak social ties. As I go about my days without Chris physically at my side but very much in my heart and in my life, I am so grateful for those interactions. This morning: saying thank you for my coffee, having a 5 minute conversation with a woman on the trail, and scritch-scratching the neck of her Doberman, whose name is Thornapple (also using Google, I found out that Thornapple is a poisonous plant that causes “hallucinations, seizures, coma, and death” – apparently the name is a warning that her dog can fuck you up, lol). Texts and phone calls and video calls are wonderful, but being in the presence of another human being is nourishing in a way all those other interactions aren’t. This is one of the reasons why, even though the office culture at work makes me crazy, I’ll be choosing to work mostly in-office for the foreseeable future. I do enjoy my own company, but at times it can feel like a thin soup. 

In just a few days’ time I will be traveling east to be with loved ones – Sam and Pokey and Jenny and Beth and Mom and Paula and Janice. I’m so excited. I am holding some of my recent nature photos back (which is very difficult for me – I’m the person who, as someone is unwrapping a gift from me, blurts out, “It’s a telescope! I hope you like it!” I have a hard time holding back on happy things) to use with my blog posts over the next two weeks, as I am sticking to my commitment to post every week and I’m not sure if I’ll have a chance to take many photos on my trip. 

Have a wonderful week, friends. To my loved ones enduring a heat wave, stay cool!

Love,

Michelle xoxo

How are doing, friends? I’m doing OK. Tired, but a good tired.

My favorite part of being a human is going into nature and reminding myself that I am a part of this. This perfection that I am surrounded by – the trees, the birds, the muskrats and the chipmunks – I belong among these beings. I belong here.

You belong here too. You are a part of this beauty. Always remember that.

Love,

Michelle xoxo

Hello friends,

In my last post I gave myself a goal of upping the fun level in my life. I did pretty well on that front over the last few days, I think. I spent Wednesday morning in the library and then went to Starbucks for an iced coffee – my favorite summertime beverage. Thursday’s dinner with work friends was fun but a bit odd as the guest of honor never showed, using the “brain fart” defense for her actions, and throwing in the heat wave as a contributing factor.

I started reading The Thursday Murder Club by Richard Osman. This is a book that has been recommended to me so many times and actually gifted to me, but I just never seemed able to start it. I have no idea why – I love lighthearted murder mysteries. The gifted book unfortunately ended up in the Friends of the Library donation pile when we did the big move purge, and so I found myself 13th in line, waiting for one of 47 digital copies of the book until my sister took pity on me and added me to her Kindle. I am enjoying this book so much; it has truly upped the fun level.

Thursday being Summer Solstice, I decided to go to the local sunset-watching park to mark the occasion. I was surprised how few people were there! The woman doing sun salutations on her yoga mat next to me also expressed this sentiment. You just can’t count on getting a decent showing for a good ol’ pagan ritual these days. (She wasn’t actually doing sun salutations, but we did have a nice chat).

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the importance of what social scientists call “weak social ties” – those people we encounter in our lives who aren’t friends or family, but are people we have fleeting contact with on a regular basis. For me it’s the two ladies who man the front desk at the gym, another woman who I like to think of as the “mayor” of the gym, the other birders I’ve had brief conversations with in the parks I’ve visited. Several studies are out showing the importance of these casual ties, especially among older people. There’s an older gentleman I’ve seen several times at my favorite birding park and we always exchange pleasantries no more than 60 seconds in duration. He is always smiling and always a delight. But I wonder sometimes, who else does this man have in his life? Could I possibly be the only person he talks to that day? Perhaps he wonders the same about me! I do know that my day is enriched by his presence. I need to cultivate more of these ties.

Have a wonderful week, friends!

Love,

Michelle xoxo

PS. I know you’ve been waiting impatiently to hear how I did in the Finals of the Diamond Tournament:

Well hello there,

I know I committed to writing here once a week, but here I sit, without a thought in my brain. I think I know why – I haven’t really given myself any time in the last seven days to be fanciful. I work out, I work, I walk, and then I’ve spent every spare moment racking points on my language learning app. You see, I’m in the Finals of the Diamond Tournament and I simply must finish in the top three! I know – very, very sad. Once this competition is over (tonight at 10pm!) I am going to step back from the app. Well, I’ll still play once a day to keep up my 127+ day streak – I can’t throw that away, come on!

The weather here was absolutely gorgeous this weekend, but we are about to enter a punishing heat wave. I do realize that my idea of a punishing heat wave would be a mild week in, say, Texas. I lived in Texas at the end of the nineties and I remember having to go for walks with Sam in the stroller at about 5am in order to avoid the 100+ degree temperatures that rolled in every dang day.

I’m very excited because I just realized that Wednesday is a holiday (Juneteenth) and our offices are closed. Thursday I am meeting with some old work colleagues in the evening. I am going to devote my free time this week to reading and writing. Reading, whether it be poetry or a novel, always helps put me into a creative space. It also helps put me into a positive frame of mind. I’ve been feeling a bit flat for the last few days, to be honest. I’ll be fine, I just need to up the fun level a bit.

Have a wonderful week!

Love,

Michelle xoxo

Looking at the photo above, I can’t help but be reminded of the character Alfalfa from Our Gang.

Hello friends,

Three weeks since returning from New Zealand, my life is finding its new rhythms. I get up at 5 during the work week and go to the gym; get up at 6 on the weekends and go to a park. I’m in the office 5 days a week as I’ve been training a new person since I got back. In the evenings I find myself back in nature, either with my camera or without. Or I just veg the heck out. I haven’t turned the TV on at all. I’ve read three books. I practice my French every day on the DuoLingo app (I’m learning French for no particular reason). I text and talk with loved ones – both the family kind and the friend kind. I’ve been sleeping straight through the night, every night.

I’m going to try to show up here in the blog every week. Share my photos from the week. Share my thoughts – if I have any. I think if I wait for inspiration it generally does not turn up. As Picasso said, “Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.”

Have a great week!

Love,

Michelle xoxo

I was in a church of my own making this morning, standing on a boardwalk over a marsh.
Birdsong and the occasional blurp of a frog.
A guy biking through with Pinball Wizard blasting so loudly from his earphones that I could hear every word.
Tree swallows zooming by so quickly and so close to me that I could touch them
If I was fast enough, which I’ll never be.
A great blue heron presiding over the ordinary pomp and circumstance of nature’s morning chorus.
I felt blessed, in the only way I can make sense of blessings – that we are either all blessed or none of us are blessed – no playing favorites.
Nature doesn’t play favorites, it welcomes all of us.

I’ve been in nature a lot lately – on the beaches of New Zealand and the forests and marshes and beaches of Ohio.
The house is sold. A house has been bought. Chris and I are in some weird transitionary period now, him in New Zealand, me in Ohio. Apart and yet closer together than we ever have been. Working toward a common goal.

More to come – photos are a random collection from the last four weeks.

Love,

Michelle xoxo