I was outside dead-heading the daisies today. They were so glorious for pretty much all of July, but with August has come the inevitable decline. It doesnāt bother me – August is one of my favorite months for the very fact that the harbingers of Autumn start to show up. That slight chill on morning walks. A few early leaves dropping from trees. Autumn is my favorite season, so I do love the anticipation August brings.
Operation Bone Strength is well underway. Iāve had my first infusion of Zometa (after a very frustrating and tear-inducing afternoon dealing with my insurance company, yikes), which I will receive every six months for the next three years. Iāve had a fitness assessment done at my new gym and have been given a resistance training routine that I will now do 3 times a week. I am counting my calcium and sodium milligrams, keeping both in optimum levels (the sodium is the hardest part for me – so many things that don’t actually taste salty contain sooooo much sodium!)
I have a new morning walk route that I have chosen because of a killer hill it contains. I walk up and down the hill repeatedly, which is good for both my cardiovascular system and my bones. Walking up and down hills, as opposed to on level ground, puts greater pressure on the skeleton because you are working against gravity as you go uphill and have added downhill physical force as you go downhill.Ā This added pressure stimulates the bones to get stronger.Ā
I love to look at the wildflowers (weeds?) as I walk. I can only identify one of them (Queen Anneās Lace!) but I find them all fascinating.
I have some exciting things planned for this month: a road trip to visit my mom in Connecticut, a mini-reunion with a group of college girlfriends, a one-hour massage after I get back from my road trip, a lovely meal to celebrate my birthday (58 -yay!).
Hope youāre having a great weekend, and a shout-out to my dear friend Lisa whose birthday is today. Happy birthday, Lisa!
One of my favorite quotes comes from Leonard Cohen: āIf you donāt become the ocean youāll be seasick every day.ā
Iāve been working on becoming the ocean lately. Accepting what is happening in each moment. Trying to appreciate my life exactly as it is right now.
Life is hectic with a full time job, a puppy, a child back in the nest trying very hard to leave the nest again (i.e. job hunting), and the inevitable unwelcome surprises that come into virtually every life.Ā
I found out a couple weeks ago that I have osteoporosis. Not entirely a surprise, as I already had osteopenia (a weakening of the bones thatās not quite severe enough to call osteoporosis yet) and Iāve been on a cancer drug for the last 6 years that is known for weakening bones.
Still, I felt a bit let down by my medical team (why did they only casually tell me to eat a calcium-rich diet all these years? Why didnāt they get me on bone strengthening drugs to counteract the cancer drugs?) and by myself (why didnāt I advocate better for myself? Why didnāt I take the osteopenia seriously enough?). I also felt like here was one more thing that cancer had taken away from me. I felt suddenly frail. Old. Vulnerable. Depressed.
Then I decided to become the ocean:
I joined a gym, have scheduled a fitness assessment, and will be starting resistance training on the weight machines there (resistance training is good for strengthening bones, as well as for counteracting the decrease in muscle mass that comes with advancing age).
I am incorporating more weight bearing exercise into my routine. Iāve always walked daily, but now I walk up and down hills in order to increase the load put on my bones with each step.
I have cut out caffeine and am counting milligrams of calcium and sodium in my diet. Why sodium, you ask? Our American diets are notoriously high in sodium, and sodium in the diet has been linked to osteoporosis. Some studies have questioned the link, but no studies have shown that eating twice the recommended amount of sodium per day (which is what many Americans do) is good for you in any way. So Iāll keep counting.
My medical team has sprung into action and I will now be receiving a twice yearly infusion of a bone strengthening drug called Zometa. That is, Iāll be receiving it if my medical insurance agrees itās necessary. My first infusion will hopefully be this Friday.
Iām starting to feel more like myself these days. Taking more photos. Getting out into nature more. Iāve scheduled a weekly hike with an old teaching friend who I didnāt see all through the pandemic. Iām spending more time in the little park at the end of the street. Iām journaling more, being better about keeping in touch with friends, and being careful about what I let into my head in the way of media (Iāve deleted the only news app on my phone and am only interested in books/movies/tv that lift me up and show me the good side of humanity).Ā
I hope youāre having a lovely weekend, friends. Iāve missed you.
Hello friends! I hope your summer is going well. As I write this Iām sitting next to a snoozing puppy – a sleeping puppy is a wonderful thing. I donāt really have a lot to report. My days consist of getting up at 6, walking a lap around the neighborhood with Sam and Pokey, walking another lap by myself, doing 30 minutes of yoga, shower/dress/breakfast, 8 hours in front of the computer, a couple more laps around the block with Chris, call my mom, dinner, tv show, puppy play, repeat. I also fit some reading in here and there. And hummingbird watching. On weekends there is more puppy, more reading, more hummingbird watching, no sitting in front of the computer.
Within this pretty ordinary structure, some less-than-ordinary events:
A trip with Pokey to the Emergency Veterinary Hospital. We thought he had swallowed a straight (sewing) pin. Two and a half hours of waiting and three very expensive x-rays later, we learned that he did not in fact swallow a straight pin.Ā
One night as I was standing in the back yard with Pokey, waiting for him to pee, he became very alert to something. I looked up to see what that something was and saw that it was a skunk walking across the top of our yard where it bordered our neighborās yard. To say I moved quickly to pick Pokey up and get both of us inside would be an understatement.
A mother squirrel leading five baby squirrels across the telephone line that runs across the corner of our yard. Amazing that they are born with such balance.Ā
One morning as Sam and I were walking with Pokey we saw a cat-sized animal scurrying around the street and front yards about 50 yards from us, making funny warbling noises. Turned out it was a (young, I think) raccoon. We walked in the opposite direction, less quickly than I had with the skunk but with what we called in the military a āsense of urgency.ā
I saw a pileated woodpecker fly low through our neighborhood, calling as it went. Lovely.
One morning on my solo walk, the heavens opened up as I was about half-way around the block. There was nothing to do but to keep walking and I was very soon soaked to the skin. Now, Iām not generally one of those perky creatures who count āwalking in the rainā as one of my favorite things. Iām not a big fan of getting wet. But once I couldnāt get much more wet, I found the experience exhilarating. It brought to mind days at the beach when I was young, for in what other circumstance does a person generally find themselves soaking wet outside?Ā
A mother deer with two tiny fawns in our back yard, the fawns frolicking back and forth while the mother waited patiently.Ā
Our āwall of daisiesā has started to bloom. There are easily more than a thousand buds in various stages of bursting forth with sunny goodness.
Today is Sunday and Iām feeling delightfully snoozy myself. I might just take a wee nap. Take care, friends. See you soon.
First nap of the day, after waking at 5amAs he gets older, his ears will stick straight up. šI think if we did a DNA test on him, we’d definitely find out he’s part “Scamp”Those eyelashes!!!
As you can see above, we have a puppy. His name is Pokey and he is a hybrid breed – chihuahua and toy fox terrier. Sam and I drove to Eastern Indiana to pick him up on Sunday and he has turned our lives upside down. Puppies are like babies, several people have said to me this week. Yes, I say, but you can put a diaper on a baby and they canāt run around for several months. Oh yes, and theyāre (usually) born without teeth.
Since January I have thought of 2021 as my āYear of Yoga.ā I really enjoy my daily yoga practice. Iāve mentioned here before how satisfying it has been to notice improvements in my strength, flexibility, and balance. I also have a goal/dream of transitioning to in-person classes and going through instructor training in 2022.
But if 2021 is my āYear of Yoga,ā the summer of 2021 is definitely going to be our āSummer of Pokey.ā Getting a chihuahua puppy has been a dream of Samās since he was about 10 years old. This summer after graduation but before his first grown-up job seemed like a perfect time to get that puppy and train him up before Sam moves on with his life. I told Sam that I would be his back-up and help out in any way I could during these first crucial months.
Pokey could not be more adorable. He is sweet and affectionate and really smart (proud grandma here). He is also a handful, as pretty much all puppies are. Iāve had puppies before, but I was younger then and I think I had blocked out all the bad parts. So as much as I truly love this little guy, itās good to have this reminder of what puppies are like, and I know that if I ever get a dog or cat in the future it will be of the adult variety.
Sorry Iāve been absent here lately. Iāve just been in a funk for the last month or so. Iāve been taking fewer photos too, and usually I start creating each blog post around the photos that I took over the previous few days. I really donāt want this blog to tail off into nonexistence. Since Iām not on social media, I like being able to communicate in this way with friends and family and whoever else out there in the world happens upon the blog. So please know that Iām not giving up on the blog and I do want it to continue but Iām struggling a bit at the moment with finding the type of energy needed to write these posts.
Hello friends – I’m thrilled to report that we’ve seen our first hummingbirds this week! It’s amazing to think that these little birds are here after traveling all the way from Mexico or Central America or somewhere else equally incredibly far away. I’m so happy to have them back for another season, although it’s been so cold and rainy this week I feel like a terrible host! Today it actually snowed for a period of about an hour and a half.
In other wildlife news, it’s been confirmed that we have a whole fox family living in the neighborhood. Chris and I saw the kits (baby foxes) cavorting like a litter of puppies when we were out walking the other day. The den appears to be at the far end of a neighbor’s yard a couple of houses down, in a group of bushes along the property line. We heard the eerie sounds (a bit like 0:08 to 0:49 in this clip) they make the other day at about 4am. Unsettling, to say the least!
Today is Mother’s Day, and I hope you are having a pleasant day. I know that this is a difficult day for some people, for many different reasons. I’ve had a relaxing day, even napping for about two hours, and have spoken to Sam a couple of times. I made myself a special breakfast of French toast with lots of butter and real maple syrup. It was fabulous. Last week was surprisingly difficult for me. I told a friend that with Sam now graduated from college, I’ve had to trade all the worries I had for him during his school years for a whole new set of worries. Now I wish I had all those old worries back! Which makes me laugh at myself – we humans really are ridiculous sometimes (sometimes?).
Hello, friends. I am knackered. I just arrived back home after spending the weekend in Cincinnati. Sam graduated on Friday evening. The weather was perfect and the ceremony was perfect (one hour long – which I think is a world record for the shortest graduation ceremony ever). I stayed on to have a fun weekend with Sam – shopping thrift stores, hiking in a gorgeous park (Mt. Airy Forest – I highly recommend a visit if you find yourself in Cincinnati and want a somewhat challenging hike), watching a movie (Spy Kids – a childhood favorite of Sam’s), and eating lots of cake, ice cream, and other goodies. I am so happy for him, so amazed at how fast that four years went by, and so tired (in a good way). I’m also feeling all the parental feels that come with watching your child finish one chapter and begin a new one.
I promised you last weekend that I would be here this weekend, and here I am! Not sure what I’m about to write, but here goes…
The last several days have been full. We are in one of our quarterly busy times at work, and the load I have been given is pretty enormous. I thought I would have to put in some significant overtime (which I wasn’t really looking forward to but there are some pieces of clothing I could purchase guilt-free if I had a little overtime cash in the bank…) but it looks like that won’t be necessary. One of my teammates has stepped up to help me out – she has a full docket herself so isn’t able to do any super heavy lifting for me, but the amount that she has been able to offer has made a serious quality-of-life difference for me during this time, and I am eternally grateful to her.
In other work-related news, I was given the official word that my company wants me to continue to work from home until the end of September. They have actually asked me to temporarily move all of my things out of my cubicle until October because they have been in the enviable position of experiencing great growth during the pandemic and have hired so many new people that they will be expanding into additional office space in our building (which won’t be ready until October). I have mixed feelings about extending my work-from-home status, especially now that I am fully vaccinated. I have some dear colleagues that I miss so much. Still, I’m going to look at this time as a gift and appreciate all that it has to offer.
We had about 3-4 inches of snow last week. It was pretty crazy to wake up and see all that snow piled up on the hummingbird feeder – I’ll bet some of those early travelers are regretting their haste to move north – but I quickly knocked all the snow off just in case. The snow was gone by bedtime (replaced by another dusting the next day), but I still have no hummingbird sightings of my own to report. Soon (I keep telling myself)!
As you can see from my photos above, we have had some fox sightings lately. The little guy/gal cuts through our back yard regularly, sometimes carrying a small furry or feathered meal in his/her mouth. One of the “meals” looked very much like a baby rabbit, and I had to hum “The Circle of Life” to myself in order to stem the tears. š
I’m writing this missive from the couch of Sam’s apartment in Cincinnati. I drove down here yesterday in order to drive him to his second Covid shot, and I’ve stayed the night in order to do some serious mama-level-comforting in case he feels like crap today. The jury is still out on that, as he is still asleep. I might have to wake him up soon, because I’ve already cleaned his kitchen, taken out the trash, and tidied up his living room, haha. I do have to say that he keeps a very tidy apartment, which is amazing since he inherited slob genes from both myself and his dad. There must be a recessive trait at work here.
Well, gang, I think that’s all for now. You take care, and I’ll see you next weekend.
Yikes! Itās been four weeks since Iāve last written here. At the beginning of the year I promised myself I would write in my blog at least once a week – it was part of my one word theme for 2021 – āTend.ā The idea was to tend to all of the things that are important to me – family, friends, my health, my photography, my writing.Ā Aye-yi-yi. Iāll spare you any excuses and just say Iām brushing myself off and getting right back on the wagon.
Although Iāve been absent from my blog, itās been a fruitful four weeks for me . Iāve done a lot of reading – some favorites have been The Jane Austen Society by Natalie Jenner (gentle and lovely) and the Rivers of London series by Ben Aaronovitch (magical cops and river gods – super fun).
Iāve been faithful to my yoga. Iām up every morning practicing with Adriene, of āYoga with Adrieneā fame (hereās her YouTube channel). Iām definitely noticing a difference in my strength, balance, and general physical confidence after practicing daily for three and a half months now. In recent years Iāve found myself getting more tentative physically, and I donāt like it. Last summer Sam and I walked on a massive rock wall along the seashore, and I hated the feeling of fragility I experienced as I picked my way along the wall. āDonāt fall and break your hip, for goodness sake,ā some new inner voice warned. Ugh. Yoga is giving me the physical tools to be able to reply to that voice, āYes, Iāll be careful – but Iāve got this. Donāt worry.ā
Spring is most definitely here (although we continue to have some chilly days – this morning was 32 degrees as I worked in the garden). I havenāt gotten down to my park at the end of the street basically since my last blog post, but Iāve been out walking the neighborhood with Chris a couple of times a day, and Iāve of course been observing the birds in our back yard every day. Robins are everywhere, bob-bob-bobbing-along, and Iāve noticed several nesting pairs of various bird species gathering nesting materials.
Soon it will be hummingbird time! Iāve been following the spring migration through this website, which collects hummingbird sightings from ordinary hummingbird-lovers like me. I put the feeder out last week, as there have been a few ruby-throated hummingbird sightings in Ohio since early April. So far I havenāt had any visitors that Iāve noticed, but itās only a matter of time.
Iāve got a spring/summer project of revitalizing the flower beds around our house. I am not a natural gardener – I tend to start strong and then totally lose interest around early June, letting the weeds take over. Part of the problem is that Iām not a big fan of being out in the sun these days, but Iām starting a routine of going out either first thing in the morning on the weekends or in early evening right before dusk during the week. I took some ābeforeā pictures, and I will let you know how itās going a couple of times this summer. That should give me some motivation to keep it up!
I got my second Covid shot last Wednesday! The day after my shot I had a bit of a fever (up to 101) and a constant headache. I have a very low threshold for headache pain and so I spent the day in bed alternating between sleeping and taking in fluids. By Friday morning, I was back to normal. I am so grateful for the scientists who developed my vaccine (and for Dolly Parton for helping to fund its development!) and am looking forward to a life slightly more normal this summer.Ā
Sam graduates from University in two weeks. He canāt wait, of course, and I am blown away (not for the first or hundredth time these days) by how quickly time goes by when you reach a certain point in life. I am so proud of his hard work, especially during his senior year when he has been so isolated due to Covid. In order for him to have some human contact, I encouraged him to get a part-time job, and he has been getting up at 4am three days a week and walking 20 minutes to start his 5-10am shift prepping food at a restaurant. Sometimes when I wake up at 6:30 bleary-eyed and wanting more snooze-time I think to myself, āSamās already been working for an hour and a half!ā That gets me going.
As I write this I am sitting in what I like to refer to as āmy cozy spotā – itās a Chesterfield love seat in our front room, loaded up with soft pillows and a snuggly blanket.Ā Itās my favorite place to hang out – I like to sit here typing and watching people pass by with their dogs and/or babies in strollers (and there is one woman who walks her dog IN a stroller), neighbors working in their yards, and cars zooming (too fast) down the street, most likely on the way to little league practice in the park at the end of the street or some other emergency. Usually Sunday afternoons hold the dreaded āSunday Anxietiesā for me, but Iām feeling pretty chill right now.Ā
I hope you have a wonderful week, and Iāll see you here next weekend (I promise!)
Happy Spring! Slowly, slowly, signs of spring are emerging all around. The robins are back. Crocuses and snowdrops are blooming, about to be followed by the daffodils. Trees are budding out.
Today I took my camera to my local park (very local, as it is located at the end of my street) to capture some of this spring awakening on film (well, memory card). I left the trail and found a fallen tree that made a perfect seat upon which to sit, look, and listen. I hung out there a good hour and a half. I heard what I’m sure was a pileated woodpecker somewhere off in the distance (they make quite a racket). I was slightly spooked by a vulture slowly soaring by, sniffing out carrion (I confess I took this opportunity to stand up and move around a bit). I saw a few smaller woodpeckers doing their thing, but they were too far away for me to get a good photo.
Then I saw a couple of black capped chickadees hanging out in a nearby bush. One at a time, taking turns, the chickadees flew to a nearby (standing) dead tree and pecked at it. There was already a hole in the tree and they nearly disappeared completely into the hole as they worked on enlarging it. We get chickadees at our feeder, but I had never seen this type of behavior in our backyard before. I subsequently found out from this article on the Audubon Society’s website that chickadees build their nests in holes they create in trees. After the male and female nesting pair create the hole (about 8 inches deep), the female will line it with moss or fur to make it comfy for the eggs and nestlings.
I don’t know what I thought the chickadees were doing (eating wood? bugs?) but when I found out that they were making a nest together, it filled me with joy. I’ve never witnessed a bird actually making a nest – ever! We did have a robin make a nest on our front door wreath last spring, which was very cool and a little annoying (having to go in and out of the house through the garage door until the fledglings left the nest weeks later), but we didn’t actually see her create it. What a treat it was, on this gorgeous, sunny, warm, early spring day, to be able to hang out with the chickadees and watch them prepare for their babies’ arrival.
On this day one year ago I was sitting in the chair at my hair stylistās getting a cut and color. My stylist Amanda and I discussed this coronavirus thing that was happening. The first case in Ohio had been reported just the day before. That night I had chorus practice – can you believe it? Just about the worst activity I could have been participating in, but we were all so innocent/ignorant then. During practice we heard that the virus had been reported in the county just north of us. It was such an ominous feeling, a feeling of āItās coming for us now.ā Iāll never forget that feeling.
Little did I know that my cut and color that day would be my last for a long while (Iāve decided to get a cut but no color after Iām fully vaccinated). The hair that I could barely get into a ponytail holder can now be French braided or put in a bun.
Little did we know that our visit to Chiliās a few days later would be our last, possibly forever. I remember sitting in Chiliās and one of the bartenders was speculating that movie theaters would shut down soon. It seemed preposterous at the time. Could that really happen? And even when it DID happen, we were all sure it would be a very temporary state of affairs. A couple weeks, a month maybe.Ā
What a surreal 12 months it has been. So difficult in so many ways. But thereās a light at the end of the tunnel now, getting brighter all the time. Yes, I know the vaccines have been out for a few months, but itās personal now. My mother has had both of her shots. My sister gets her second shot soon. Several friends are now fully vaccinated. Chris got his first shot today. And last night I was able to make an appointment for my first shot.
Soon Iāll make that haircut appointment. Iāll make other appointments (eye doctor, dentist) that Iāve put off during this time. Life will start to look a little more normal.
Of course the new normal wonāt be exactly the same as our pre-Covid days, and some of that is by choice. Weāve decided that we enjoy our at-home Saturday date nights more than we did our Chiliās date nights. I wonāt be returning to chorus – I enjoyed it, but it also stressed me out, and Iāve decided my free time is too precious for more stress. Iām sure Iāll be returning to the office sometime in the next few months, but Iām hoping that even after I return, there will be some opportunity to work from home occasionally. Weāll see.Ā
For now, Iām just so grateful for the scientists who have created these vaccines. Where would we be without them? Still wandering around in the dark, Iām sure.
